Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Bachelor Review: Week Three

More observations from the girls.

• Michelle, SLC girl, do you know you are on the Bachelor? Of course he is going to be dating other people!
• Michelle, you act like you are 16, and we know for a fact you are 30, you told us repeatedly last week.
• We can’t figure out why they are ruining a perfectly good Seal song. They are awful.
• It is sad we live in a world where the vampire has the most integrity. Good move vampi, good move. But a bad move on the side boob.
• Emily, we’re rooting for you.
• Funeral director we like you.
• We’re certain that Michelle took the vampire’s fangs when she left. Michelle continues to creep us out.
• Blond girl that got sent home. “I intimidate guys.” (Famous last words). Every girl I ever known to say this is still alone.
• Wow, every single girl has a tragic story; this was a handpicked crew for sure. It’s a good thing there is a therapist on call.
• Loved, loved that Brad had to have a quick session with his therapist. Too funny.
• Chris Harrison, your position is being threatened by someone with credentials. Are you just going to stand by and let this happen? Go counsel Brad, go, go!
• I’m foreseeing a group therapy session with the whole crew, oh that would be fabulous. Those girls can cry!
• Brad, we hate your tattoo, but love your abs.
• Michelle we are so glad you are the only one who knows what’s best for Brad. Even his therapist can’t articulate like you can. We’re so lucky so have you.
• We don’t know who the red head is.
• Chantel your leopard dress is too much; you look like a cougar mom. Also, your boobs are overwhelming us.
• Back when I was dating we cried to our girlfriends and moms not our fake boyfriend who was also seeing 15 other women. You girls are looking crazy.
• ABC way to hype up the fact that someone voluntarily left your show, (wasn’t that big of a deal). I guess it wasn’t as bad as Ali’s season when you made it look as if Casey attempted suicide, when in fact he got a tattoo.
• Michelle is confident she will be the last one standing, and I guess she will after she murders all the other girls. That’s one way of doing it, I guess.
Ladies, see you next week for our ever so formal rose ceremony.


  1. HA HA HA H!!! I always look forward to these reviews. It helps me relive all of our laughs! HA HA HA!!

  2. Love your reviews! Actually I never really watched it faithfully before, but now I do just so I can know who you're referring to. And because I'm addicted now...(not just to Brad's abs).

  3. This made me laugh out loud again!! But I think my favorite part of the night was the big hole in your underwear:)

  4. I haven't watched the Bachelor in several seasons but I tuned in last night. Holy Cow Salt Lake City Bitty! She's a freak! I picture her stalking him after the show. And I'm sorry...but he's such a dumb ass for not seeing right through her.

  5. The red heads name is Lindsey and I must say she looks like a transvestite, I know it's mean but I'm just confused, is she for sure a girl? I LOVE reading your reviews!!!:)

  6. I got on your blog today specifically searching out a Bachelor review. Thank you for not letting me down. Keep 'em coming.

  7. PS..I named Michelle Bitchelle! Just thought you'd like to know!