Tired and worn out all Alice wanted to do was bake
some sugar cookies, eat more frosting than socially acceptable and finally
start season one of Downton Abbey.
Resisting her urge, she filled her cup with coffee
using slightly more cream than usual. As she generously poured the cream she
thought, what the hell, these extra calories may just be the highlight of my
week. She headed to the darkest corner
of her home where her computer stood ready and waiting. She hacked away at the
keyboard trying to create something, anything. Words ran through her fingers,
sentences formed but a brick wall came crashing in between her mind and the
screen, she could no longer see any value in what she was writing. “More
pointless shit by your truly,” She said aloud.
She dropped her head in her hands, her thumbs playing
with her earrings, pinkies rubbing her eyelashes she let out a sigh. She said
to herself, if I’m not going to write maybe I’ll listen to some lyrics and call
it research. She began streaming Brandi Carlile. Brandi could make it better,
she thought. As she listened to her words,
I am afraid of crossing lines
I am afraid of flying blind
Afraid of inquiring mindsAfraid of being left behind
And when you feel like giving in
Or the coming of the end
Like your heart could break in two
Someone loves you, yeah.
She realized two things, One, Brandi did have all
the answers, and two her fears had stopped her from writing what she wanted.
What would the repercussions be? What if I write my truth? What will they think
of me? As she questioned the limitations of this fear she noticed this was no isolated
incident. She had questioned every little thing in her life. She sipped on her coffee,
closed her eyes, the warmness trickled down her throat and when she opened her
eyes the wall was gone. The fear, dissipated, she wrote and wrote. Her fingers
barley keeping up with her thoughts, tears wet her cheeks. Once the truth
was out and on paper, suddenly she felt light, she felt free. “Thanks Brandi,”
She said as she closed her laptop.
I adore how the reader never knows exactly what she is writing - a memoir? Fiction? Poetry? What sort of truth is she holding inside? That secret adds a level of intriguing mystery to the peice. I like it.
ReplyDeleteI love Brandi. She's my "go to" when I'm cooking dinner. Her songs are so unexpectedly beautiful, and I think that's because she is so honest.
ReplyDeleteI really loved what you did with this. Rubbing her earrings, playing with her eyelashes. I have done these exact things, but have never thought about them until now.
Writing is about finding those details. Great, great job.
LMAO! I'm so sorry, but this really struck home, especially the eating more frosting than was socially acceptable. I LOVED IT!
ReplyDelete