Monday, January 31, 2011

Bachelor Review: Week 5

More Observations from the girls
• Chris Harrison I know Brad’s intuitive therapist has sort of taken your job, but wearing that flamboyant shirt won’t change any of that.
• Chris it’s obvious you’re having a hard time adjusting… I think I know who would make a great therapist for you.
• Wow, Chantel that cleavage is something else! Your boobs are so big they look like a bum!
• Chantel, what’s with the mesh?
• Marissa take heart my dear none of us knew anything about you.
• Oh my goodness the performance with Ashley and Brad. Boring, awful, awkward, with a majorly obvious Bradley Crotch shot. Who was camera man? My guess is Chris Harrison.
• Ahh.. no fair.. (Insert my annoying whine sound here.) I want a Vegas shopping spree.
• Good Job Shawntel you got Brad to smile and laugh.. for the first time this season.
• Shawntel the bad news.. He’d rather just talk about his feelings and console you while you cry.
• Another emergency phone call with Brad’s therapist. Where Brad revealed things like, “These feelings I’m feeling feel real.” Profound Brad, really profound.
• Brit, was there a heart accessory sale at Claire’s? I missed it, I’m pissed.
• Michelle you look like a cartoon villain. Walt Disney could not have drawn a more perfect villain. Do you think it’s the eyebrows? Or could it be the fact that she physically assaulted Brad? Hmm..
• Ashley, you are going to be okay. If history has taught us anything it’s that you can be on the Bachelor as many times as you want. See you next season.
• Lisa, another fatality, we liked your dress, but your goodbye crying were the only words we have ever heard from you. In this show you have to be aggressive to survive. Aggressive, or a murderer.. you know like Michelle.
• Taking Emily to the race track. Oh ABC… you don’t have an ounce of class. And the sad thing is, neither do I, as I faithfully watch this train wreck each week.
• This journey. That journey. My journey. Our journey. We got it, enough!
• The little tiny cake to make Ali fell special. I would have been like, “Is this a fat joke?”
• Oh what I would give to be the limo driver of the rejected? Can we say Dream Job!
Ladies, thank you for taking this journey with me, it’s been an amazing journey and through this journey I think we can have a future together and I hope we can continue our journey wherever this journey takes us. Hopefully at the end of this journey we can all find our soul mates. I wish you all a journariffic week.
p.s. Don't forget to take the quiz found on the picture above...


  1. HA HA HA HA HA HA!!! I look forward to these reviews every Tuesday! Amen on the dream job comment. . . well, actually AMEN to the whole post!! HA HA HA!!

  2. Seriously, this is where I click first chance I get on Tuesdays. I would be so sad if you stopped with your reviews. The only thing that would make it better if you were ON the Bachelor to really mix it up. Come on. Mace won't mind.

  3. I'd give anything to be watching this season with my bachelor watching friends.

  4. I wouldn't want to take this journey with anyone else. You are my soulmate and my counselor says I am ready to commit to you and only you. Too much information? Yeah. Tell Mason to watch his back.