Monday, January 10, 2011

A Case of the Monday's

Last Monday was a day from hell. I'm just now finding the strength to write about it. I woke up at 1 am to feed Milly (ya that's a whole other issue I need to deal with), went back to bed woke up at 7:30 am, and silly me, I thought I'd go to the gym. I hadn't been in over a week because Milly has been sick and I'm one of those moms that honor the sick code for kids club.. you're welcome.. Dropped her off went to Pilate's class where I wanted to die... the lady from kids club came up the stairs, and I apologize for the comparison, but when the kids club lady walks it's almost as if a serviceman from the army came in with a letter and everybody's kid is at war and you are just praying the letter is not for you.The first time the kids club worker came into the class it was for another lady.. oh thank goodness.. but the next time it was for me, and she came with the worst of reports. I was in an ever compromising Pilate's position when she sweetly whispered, "There has been blowout," through my panting I said, "I'll be right down." Came down to Milly's pink polka dot pants, which now, oddly enough, had a huge yellow polka dot. I went to the bathroom to change her and I do not know why I didn't have an extra outfit. Have I not been a mother for almost a year now? What the hell is wrong with me, that I cannot remember this!!!??? The changing table was slanted and therefore I had to keep one hand on Milly so she wouldn't fall, and when you are as short as I am your arm does not reach that far to get diapers, wipes and antidepressants. (You know all the diaper changing necessities.) All the while my legs are literally shaking form the class, the kind of shake that make your muscles twitch. So I wiped out the poopy pants as best I could and put them back on my daughter. Meanwhile Milly has been screaming.. probably because she just realized the moron without an extra outfit is her mother, and therefore she is screwed until she's 18. (A lot to take in for an infant.) All I could think was I've got to get the hell out of here before they see me and miss poopy pants. I honestlyy felt like I was on 16 and Pregnant but with less of the "F" word thrown in my mom's direction.

I called the Dr. and asked should this antibiotic for her earache be working my now? The poor little thing has still been pulling at her ear. Yes it should you'll have to bring her in again. I had to go home first. Milly fell asleep in the car I took her in the house left her sleeping in her car seat which usually never works, but by the grace of God it did today. I ran up put on some clothes and by the smell of me later that day, really wished I would have had the time put some deodorant on. I decided maybe I should put some clean pants on Milly so the state doesn't take her from me and tried to do so while she was still in the car seat.. didn't work, rushed to the doctor where he prescribed yet another antibiotic, all the while Milly was screaming. She hates the doctor and every other human on the planet, including her mother, apparently. I drove to the pharmacy and got groceries while I was there. As I was shopping I saw pear apples.. love pear apples.. have you tried them? I put them in a sack, the sack broke, the pear apples dropped to the ground and splattered.. So embarrassed what do I do pick up all the fruit.. and put it where? So I casually put the fruit on a box next to the rest of the pears.. then I tried it again.... and I kid you not, the same result more fruit splattering on the floor. I looked ridiculous and felt like crying this was just not my day. Finally I left the produce area so people could start to point and laugh without feeling so bad. In my haste I did spot some sushi rolls. As I looked at the rolls I thought they didn't look that good but they did look better than anything I was going to make. I took a good hard look, and thought who knows this grocery store sushi may just be the highlight of my week, and into the cart they went.
I came home put Milly in a highchair started to unload the groceries pulled out the Sushi and attempted to pour some soy sauce, missed the tray and the sauce began to cover my kitchen table. I sat down picked up a roll and began to swirl it right on the table lapping up the soy sauce. Yep, didn't even try to clean it up. Chased down my lunch with a diet coke, took ten deep breaths. Looked at the clock, which read 1:00 pm and took another ten deep breaths.


  1. The good news is you aren't alone! We all have had moments just like that. Wait til you lock her in the car. That's a nice feeling! Sorry about the apple pears. Never had them but they sound good. Not sure if I dare try and fill a bag full of them though!

  2. Lindy, I am so glad I found your blog. You are hilarious! And you baby is adorable. So glad we can keep in touch now!