Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Bachelor Review: Week 6

• I often go to Costa rica with a guy I have never been on a date with. I wish
• Do these girls know two dates does not a marriage make?
• Oh Brad a helicopter ride. However did you plan this all on your own? I’m sure ABC didn’t help you out.
• Michelle the egotistical one is you.. Oh my goodness get a grip sweetheart.
• Michelle your behavior will not help your Mormon acting career.
• Longest zip line in the world. Wow Brad you really did your research.
• Nice boob touch with Chantal, the old arms around her front hug…
• Yes Chantal all relationships are indeed like zip lining.
• Seriously Mr. No Personality the zip line did not even seem to excite you.
• Yes Chantal, this is like real life. In fact my husband and I are always zip lining. Marriage is nothing but a constant party.
• Brad are you trying to be awkward?
• Brit did you buy out all the heart gear? Leave some for the rest of us.
• Chantal I’m beginning to think you’re just on this show to give your plastic surgeon some advertising. Those Boobs! Oh my goodness I was completely distracted.
• Seriously it’s the second date Chantal and you don’t have pants on! Oh my!
• Brad. Tevas? Really?
• Loved the hugs each received before they repelled.. Now we know he’ll be a good husband.
• Michelle do us a favor and stop being SO honest.
• Brad did you really make a repelling pact on the Bachelor? You’ve done this show before as you may recall. You know there would be more repelling. Next you’ll tell us you made a helicopter pact.
• Brad the whole “No Rose Speech” Did your therapist help you script it?
• Michelle tell us how you really feel?
• Alli.. wow big knockers.
• Alli and Brad, small talk on first date. Did you know most people make small talk on their first date? It’s just we usually don’t go to Costa Rica for a first date.
• Brad you need to learn another word for amazing.. maybe try fantastic on for size.
• Chantal pulls out the “I Love You.” Brad replies with a gracious, “thank you.” This show is sick.
• Alli and Jackie were dumped. Both were classy in front of Brad and cried in the limo. Big surprise.
• Michelle is still on. She’s had a big role in this season. She has taken over Chris Harrison’s job as the narrator. She arranges her own dates (sneaky). She has taken over Brad’s mind and does all his thinking for him. She’s also been busy plotting out how she will murder and bury all the other women. So give her a break, she’s had a lot on her chest, and that’s not including all that silicone.

 Ladies, I missed you dearly. My journey was not the same without you.


  1. I love reading these! I actually didn't start watching until I started reading your review! haha Michelle is only on the show because if he dumped her it would eliminate any and all drama and the show would die. It's boring without her melodramatic narration! Thanks Lindy!

  2. Love your review! I am sad to say that I am addicted to that show. I'm pretty sure it's not supposed to be a comedy, but (for the reasons you listed above) I can't but help laughing the entire time. Plus, it gets me through my Monday laundry folding.

  3. I missed you as well! I always need your sarcasm, but know you that! Again, BRAVO on another hilarious recap!! LOVED IT!! Hope you are feeling better!

  4. Chantal's boobs made Kenz not want to have big boobs anymore and that's saying something!!