Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Bachelor Review: Week 7

This week our journey will be in Belize to give Ben ample opportunity to sport striped tank tops, and he does.
Lindzi get s a one on one, which causes Nicki to cry, of course.
He had an amazing date planned for him and Lindzi, which involved a helicopter. How does Ben come up with all these great date ideas?
They then jump out of the helicopter from about 10 feet up (pansy asses), they compared this jump to the jumps we take in relationships, just like you knew they would.
Then they send a message in a bottle. WTF? Lindzi thought this was a romantic activity. Again, WTF? Then Linz said something about fairy tales and prince charming, I missed the rest because this kind of talk always makes me puke.
Lindzi wears too much makeup.
Next Emily gets a one on one, which causes Courtney to cry and suggest she is suicidal. Yes, that seems like a normal, healthy reaction.  
Does his hair keep getting worse?
They fish for lobster and Emily actually believes this is a random happening. Isn’t Ben spontaneous? No Emily he is not, he did not come up with one original date idea. Sweetie you’ve seen this show before haven’t you?
Courtney stays behind and bitches about Emily being on a date. Here’s the thing girl, you can leave at anytime.
Courtney gets a one on one, so for a moment she gets up off the floor and stops kicking, screaming and crying. We should all be so grateful.
The group date includes Rachel, Kacie B., Nicki and sharks.
Do we need to still call her Kacie B.? The other one went home.
Kacie is more scared of Rachel getting all the attention than she is of sharks. Proving, jealousy will kill you faster than a fierce aggressive animal will. Oh, the lessons we learn from the Bachelor.
The group date participants warn Ben about our favorite villain, Courtney.
Rachel and Emily are sent packing. Yes we are all shocked Courtney is staying. The wicked witch reigns again.
Another valuable lesson: Ben’s a tool.
Next week our journey will whisk is away to the home towns of Courtney, Lindzi, Nicki and Kacie. 


  1. Oh, how I've missed these posts! I've been MIA from blogging for months. But this was totally worth coming back to! Thanks for the laugh. (PS--apparently while I was gone last night with my girls, Brian stayed home and he and the boys watched part of this Bachelor episode. Child worthy? I doubt it. But either way, my boys had some serious opinions about it this morning while they were getting ready for school. I should let them read your blog. I'm sure they would concur.) :)

    1. Emily, I'm so glad you're back. You need to update your blog. I miss reading it. Am I going to have to invite Brian and the boys to my next Bachelor Viewing party?

  2. I want to reach through the screen and grab Ben by his moppy hair and then punch him in the nuts! He is by far the biggest loser and why the "women" have a desire to be with someone who can't see through Courtney's craziness is beyond me! And secondly....the fact that I get so involved in this train wreck of a show should prove that I quite possibly need professional help!

    1. Ha. I love you, and yes, we both need professional help.